The Key to Peace and Blessings This Year and The Grief of Unanswered Duas

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

1 Verse :

1 Story :

Sometimes we are in so much pain that we ask Allah for things even when He has already shown us signs that this thing is not good for us. But the pain of letting things go—the pain of acceptance, the grief of things—blinds us. And so we tell ourselves: Hey, Allah can do anything. He is the Most Powerful. If He just did this for me, I would be happy. And we hastily ask Allah for evil as we should ask for good, as if we know what is good for ourselves.

Grief has complex manifestations. It does not simply hurt—it distorts. It narrows vision. It turns certainty into bargaining. It makes the heart argue with truth even when the mind has already surrendered.

And we see a prophet doing this too.

Nuh عليه السلام struggled with da‘wah for 950 years. He gave da‘wah. But his qawm was stubborn and said:

Nuh عليه السلام was told this by Allah :

And so Allah commanded Nuh عليه السلام to build an ark:

Very few people from his ummah had believed.

Now the sky opens.
Water is rising.
Waves begin to appear.
The boat starts to waver from one end to the other.

Nuh عليه السلام already knows who is going to be saved and who is going to be drowned. Allah has already told him—nobody is going to become a believer except the people who already believed. So he knows his son is not a believer. There are no more new converts.

But when the waves start hitting and the storm becomes violent, and he sees his son out in the outskirts somewhere—climbing on top of a rock by himself—his heart melts.

He calls him.

“Ya bunayya.”
“My little boy.”

He is not little. But in that moment—this is not a prophet speaking. This is a father remembering a child he once carried, once protected, once prayed for in the dark.

Allah tells us:

Just come on.
Just come on.
Just get on board with us.

It is almost like: Ya Allah, You told me no… but can we make an exception?

His feelings have taken over. Notice—he does not say, “don’t disbelieve.” He says, “don’t be with the disbelievers.” He cannot bring himself, in that moment, to pronounce the final judgment on his own child. It is like saying, not “don’t be a criminal,” but “don’t hang out with criminals.”

If he says it clearly, it becomes final.
And grief resists finality.

The son has no plan of escape. He sees the water. He can confirm his father was right. He has already seen people drown—he is alone now, which means others are already gone. And yet, even when he has no solution, he rejects the father’s solution—the only logical solution.

Any mountain.
Anywhere.
Anywhere but you.

This is not ignorance anymore. This is stubbornness at its peak. Before, his mind refused. Now even his heart refuses.

Nuh عليه السلام is almost saying: You don’t even have to believe—just look for mercy. Because the Qur’an tells us that when people are drowning, even disbelievers call upon Allah sincerely. For one moment, truth breaks through terror.

This was the last attempt.

A wave rises between them.
A wall of water.
When it passes, the rock is empty.

He does not know how his son died. He does not know if he drowned, if he was crushed, if he struggled. Allah says: he was among the drowned. But Nuh AS doesn’t know that yet. Or rather he can’t accept it yet. Grief sometimes shows up as denial.

Now the water settles.
The earth swallows what it must.
The ark rests on the mountain.

The storm is over—but Nuh’s heart is not.

He does not complain.
He does not protest.

He chooses the softest words a servant can use:

This is the same Nuh AS who once said:

Allah answered that prayer.
And now the silence is unbearable.

He is trying to understand.

Maybe… maybe his son is still alive.

Allah replies:

Ibn Kathir explains: Nuh عليه السلام did not know with certainty that his son was a disbeliever. He thought he might have been a hypocrite. Had he known, he would never have made this du‘a—because a prophet does not knowingly go against Allah’s command.

And here is the rule we learn:

Before making du‘a, we must check whether what we are asking for is allowed.
If doubtful, refrain.
If forbidden, never ask.

If this restraint applied to a prophet in grief, how much more to us.

Nuh immediately controls himself:

And then—only then—Allah says:

Peace does not come before surrender.
Relief does not come before restraint.
The ark does not open until the heart submits.

And this is why sometimes Allah does not give us what we beg for.

Not because He cannot.
But because grief is speaking—not wisdom.

1 Lesson :

Yes—Allah is capable of all things.
And yet, sometimes Allah does not give us certain things we ask Him for. We tell ourselves: Allah can make this person, this job, this situation good for me—after all, Allah is capable of all things.

But the reality is this: we must refrain from insisting on things about which we have no true knowledge.

We possess limited knowledge and limited understanding. Our judgments are shaped by past experiences, trauma, emotional wounds, and cognitive biases. We only see the past and the present—often through pain. Allah alone sees the future, the hidden consequences, and what is truly best for us.

The issue is not duʿā’.
The issue is the assumption that I know best.

Human beings are always in a hurry.
They want results now.
Answers now.
Relief now.

Even when Allah is trying to protect them.

We are not meant to dictate to Allah what we think is good for us. We are meant to seek what is with Allah, trusting His wisdom over our impulses. We plan—but Allah is the best of planners, not us. Allah alone is All-Knowing and All-Wise, while we remain bound by limited perception and understanding.

This is why we must humble ourselves before Allah’s wisdom.

Slow down.
Let Allah decide what good actually means.

That is precisely why the Prophet ﷺ taught us Istikhārah. I love this dua because its a dua or surrender and acceptance that Allah alone knows and we don’t. We say :

Ask Allah—but ask Him the right way.

1 Question for you :

What am I currently asking Allah for that is emerging from pain, fear, or grief rather than clarity?

Dhikr of the week:

رَبِّ إِنِّىٓ أَعُوذُ بِكَ أَنْ أَسْـَٔلَكَ مَا لَيْسَ لِى بِهِۦ عِلْمٌ وَإِلَّا تَغْفِرْ لِى وَتَرْحَمْنِىٓ أَكُن مِّنَ ٱلْخَٰسِرِينَ

“My Lord, I seek refuge in You from asking You about what I have no knowledge of, and unless You forgive me and have mercy on me, I will be one of the losers.”
(11:47)

Task of the week :

Memorize duʿā’ Istikhārah:
https://sunnah.com/hisn:74

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Until next Thursday in shā’ Allāh

— Aaira

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P.S. I’m sorry I’ve been MIA for the past two weeks. I had been traveling and barely had time to study or write. I’m planning to compensate for it by writing on Mondays as well this month, in shā’ Allāh.